My birthday was this past week! My Aunt Katy had a birthday dinner at her house with favorite foods and German Chocolate cake! Yum. ManChild remembered the canvases that I was looking at the week before but not allowing myself to have—yay!
He's officially inches taller than me now, thank goodness for my hair so I can still pretend ;-)
B-Rad gave me some gorgeous emerald earrings and something called a CenterCam—check it out! It puts a clip on video camera where you want it on your computer screen so you can look directly at the person you're talking to on Zoom. I love it!
This mug made me laugh and laugh!
I was diagnosed with ADHD this week and it wasn't really a surprise to me. Over the past year there has been more info about adult women and ADHD and how girls are so often overlooked because we typically have a different type than those little boys in school who couldn't sit still.
"Girls are socialized to behave differently than boys." How many times have we heard, "Boys will be boys!"?
ADHD brains are wired differently and honestly I didn't know that—they have low levels of a neurotransmitter called norepinephrine. Norepinephrine is linked arm-in-arm with dopamine. You can watch a short video about it here.
When someone I follow was diagnosed with ADHD and she started talking about her symptoms, I was floored. Here is a quick quiz to take if you're a woman and wondering about yourself.
So, I decided to test the ADHD medication waters, will it help more or less than neurofeedback? The medication she prescribed was Adderall. All I can say is: FOCUS! Cool! And also it spiked my BP and had my heart pounding—felt like my head would pop right off my neck when I bent over, yikes. Then of course there was that edge of a panic attack after the first two hours of focus. Having lived with daily panic attacks from 2009-2015, my body is familiar. Of course, I knew the why behind this one but the physical effects were still there and felt awful.
The psychiatrist gave me a child's dose of 5mg because I said I was super sensitive. She said I probably wouldn't notice it—but I know myself so I only took 1/4 of it lol. My 1/4 of a child's dose lasted about 4ish hours—focus wise anyway. The panic stayed with me until I went to sleep at 10pm, about 13 hours total.
Will I try another medication? Maybe, but for now, back to daily neurofeedback! A fix without the panic attack!
I have found quite a bit of info about learning better skills on this YouTube channel called How to ADHD, she's very sweet and earnest :-) This week's skill, which came to me during my mere moments on Adderall was to set a timer on my phone and keep the app up and running so I can see it. When my mind wanders off, the phone rings, or an interesting email pops up from Facebook, I see that timer counting down and go back to what I was doing. Simple but it's working, this week anyway. Feel free to send me more tips if you have them!
I think the only thing that dumbfounds me is that I know so many people in my family that are a lot like me, so it all seems very normal you know? And when I realized that my family ADHD is not the norm...I'm surprised that other people live their lives being able to easily do things I find very hard. Weird.
I want to sing the praises of my Tiny Dancer!
This sweet 4 month old girl was a recent star of a coaching session and I'm just so tickled about it! I had an adult client who was struggling to make a tough decision in her life. Her intuition was very quietly leading her one way and her loving family and friends another.
I've been watching Dancer in the past few months. When the goats are with a client, they all come swirling in, excited to be with someone new. Eventually after many scratches, they will often drift off—sometimes to bed down nearby and chew their cud or maybe to go eat some hay. Dancer always stays in the session.
In this session, she stayed close, jumping up into my lap but not in the client's. While she was in my lap, I mentally asked her if she could help our client. Toward the end of the session, as we worked through her options, the client suddenly had this edge of an "ah-ha" moment and Dancer just leaped into her lap—like she was saying, "YES! You've got it! Good job!" It was so perfectly timed that we both looked at each other and laughed! I just love her to pieces and will be really interested to see how she develops as a therapy goat ❤️
I've started a new horse painting and I'm pretty excited about it!
And while I'm not yet ready to show it to you since I'm in the middle of it, I can say I'm going through rounds of the "Creativity Process." It's a new style so I'm muddling my way through. Sometimes I'm like, "OMG! Fabulous!" and others I'm questioning my ability to paint at all—so rounds and rounds of:
The Creativity Process
1. This is AWESOME
2. This is TRICKY
3. This is SHIT
4. I AM shit
5. This MIGHT be ok
6. This is AWESOME
If (WHEN!) it turns out and if I'm feeling extra brave, maybe I'll show you some of the in between photos. I have 6 so far and it's the only reason I can continue on, because I can see the beautiful changes it's going through.
In the meantime I'm finishing up the last book illustration that I was hired to do. There were 12 and I'm happy I'm nearly done! I only had 3 photos to go by as the dog has gone to heaven so they are mostly composite pieces which has made it harder. This is the first one I've done and I've learned a ton!
ODDS AND ENDS
It's not as deep as it looks here and doesn't need stitches. I put some medicine on it and her fly mask.
The horses and mini donkey had their mani/pedis this week. Wynter always comes over and stands near little Sweetness to give him support. This time he was wetly snuffling all over his face ❤️
I will have to tell you more soon, but Lucy is coming along nicely in her training. On this day she decided to hang out with me for most of the work day :-) Also, I just love the light in my office ❤️
Oooooo! An egret!
We don't usually get those here but this one has been hanging around this week. Maybe it will stay!
We do have a blue heron in residence though. It's always around or in the pond fishing.
Sometimes I'm just sitting at my desk and working when something catches my eye—like this hummingbird looking in on me:
Or this one, just sitting still! What? I've never seen one sitting still before!
Or this deer wandering by, not even 10 feet from my window:
MEMES OF THE WEEK
This made me strangely happy. I always see the old pics where the people are so serious and I've always thought, "Jeez. They must be so unhappy!" And then this one came along:
I just love her work:
Thank you to my brother who sent me these all through the week and kept me laughing:
What makes me laugh most about this one is the misspelled, "Breeth Breeth!" I'm betting a kid drew this and if so that makes it even better :-) I assume you know Darth Vader. The other character is Thanos from Marvel movies. I know this because I'm "boy and girl." 😂 Plus, I have a 15 year old boy ;-)
If you'd like to work with me:
Commission a painting or bring your logo idea to life,
buy a tshirt or a print with my artwork.
If you are in my area (Apex, NC and surrounding areas) I'm offering a special deal for you to come try out neurofeedback, coaching, and Reiki!
Half off your first neurofeedback session ($35 for 45 minutes instead of $70)
$25 off your first Equine Gestalt Coaching session ($100 for an hour instead of $125)
Half off your first Reiki session ($45 for an hour instead of $90)
Please take me up on these—and yes, you can use all three, in fact I encourage it! Doing neurofeedback or Reiki before a coaching session puts you in a regulated state which the animals love and is ideal for the work. Doing neurofeedback or Reiki after helps you process your session :-) so it works either way. The coaching setting is beautiful with the horses, donkey, and goats and in my air conditioned neurofeedback room you have a view of the pond and the wildlife that surrounds it. We are in a covered barn for coaching so are in the shade and out of any rain or weather. Reiki can be inside or outside in the barn, depending on weather and client wishes.
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