I had an accident back in November and have been struggling with back pain ever since. About 4 months ago I recognized that I had inadvertently changed my walk because of the pain and fear of falling and hurting myself more. I began to retrain my body to return to my original way of walking and my lower back and hip pain resolved. Whooohooo! But, even with a lot of rest and a heating pad, I wasn't getting getting anywhere in the healing of my upper back and neck.
Some months ago, I tried Dr. David Hanscom's Expressive Writing Technique, (what I like to call, Fu#! You Writing—it helps to get me in the right frame of mind.) It's a useful way to get anger out of your body. Rip it up and throw it away when done. Seems overly simplistic but it works. Our healing is like peeling an onion and this can be one of the many layers!
3 weeks ago, I remembered the saying, "Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results is the definition of insanity." What I was doing over and over was basically nothing, a lot of rest, I was so afraid of further injuring my body—so I started paying attention to my Inner Voice, asking it questions and getting specific answers. For instance, "Is there something actually wrong with my upper back and neck or am I in pain for some other reason?" Answer: "Your neck and back are both tight and weak." Ok, both made sense, I've been babying them for 8 months. However, I wasn't so sure what to do with that.
I had suspected for some time that a piece of the puzzle is speaking up for myself. I've been working on that. Boundaries. Yipee.
Then my chiropractor turned energetic healer mentioned (again!) backintelligence.com. I found the stretches for the upper back and neck and began doing them, tiny bits at a time. They were helping. It wasn't a cure all but it was a start.
You can reach Dr. Ditter at 720-384-6788, she works over the phone so can work with people from anywhere. She also offers a free consultation!
2 weeks ago I had an interesting dream and didn't know what to make of it so I went out to be with the horses in the cool of early morning. As I was writing about the dream with the horses all around me, I realized that I was holding onto anger that I thought was long gone. As soon as I recognized it, whoosh, it lifted off of me and floated away. Huh. And here I thought I had done enough Fu#! You Writing!
Hidden anger can be stored in our bodies as pain. Yes, accidents happen, as I well know, but how we recover, or not, from them is telling.
Dr. Hanscom says he does the Fu#! You Writing every day! From little things to big, it's a safe, simple way of ridding our body of anger and pain.
Am I pain free now? No, but it's a lot less. But maybe most important is that instead of feeling like I'm never going to get better, I now have hope. The lifting of unresolved anger gave me hope. I've even been out gardening for the first time in 8 months! Things are looking up on the healing front and I'm feeling thankful.
I'm going to be more closely following Dr. Hanscom's steps and see what other changes in pain I can create.
Stage 1 (of 4) is:
1. Learn about chronic pain & anger—Dr. Hanscom said recently in a blog post: I learned of the many disguises of anger. I now know that anxiety and anger are the same entity, representing the feeling caused by elevated stress hormones and inflammatory markers. So interesting! I've never heard this before and will be looking into it!
2. Expressive writing—Fu#! You Writing every day
3. Active meditation—something I've started working on—for me meditation is sitting quietly, preferably outside with animals, notebook ready just in case anything comes through. I've also added neurofeedback back to my schedule.
4. Sleep— I've been getting at least 8 hours and whenever possible I don't have an alarm to wake up. With consistent 8 hours my body can naturally wake up. It's such a gift and I'm getting better quality sleep.
5. Don't share your pain—because you manifest what you focus on—focus on pain, get more pain.
A rambling post but I wanted to share a few things that were really helping.
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