Happy Saturday friends!
I don’t even understand how it’s July already. When I was young I remember grandparents saying that time seemed to fly by but nowadays EVERYONE says it, even the 30 somethings in the Wednesday Women’s Circle say it now. What's going on? So, of course I went searching and found this explanation:
There's real psychology behind why it feels that way, and why it feels that way earlier in life now than it used to for previous generations.
A few things going on:
Proportional time: When you're 5, a year is 20% of your entire life. When you're 50, it's 2%. Each year is a smaller slice of the pie you've already eaten, so it feels like it goes faster relative to what came before. This part really is just math and it's been true forever.
Novelty makes time "thick.": Your brain lays down more memory when things are new, first horse, first job, first heartbreak. Routine days barely get recorded. So a summer packed with new experiences feels long in memory even though it flew by while you were living it, and a summer of the same errands and routines feels like it vanished. This is likely why more people report the feeling younger now: modern adult life, especially once you're past the first-decade-of-adulthood milestones, tends to be more routinized and less novel than it used to be, more scrolling, more sameness, less genuinely new stuff happening to mark the calendar.
Less unstructured boredom: Ironically, boredom stretches perceived time in the moment. Constant stimulation (phones, notifications, tasks) compresses it. So even 30-somethings, who in past generations might not have felt the "time is flying" thing until midlife, are hitting it younger now partly because their days are more packed and more mediated by screens.
So it's not the clock changing, it's your brain's bookkeeping. More new, textured experiences (the kind you get planning a whole garden bed or watching a herd of goats do something ridiculous) slow the felt sense of time down, even if the actual days pass at the same rate they always did.
So it's even more reason to get off my phone and play!
Speaking of playing, I have just one more spot in my upcoming Tuesday Women's Circle, if it's yours, contact me here.
Details:
Tuesdays
11am—1pm
August 4—Sept 8
$210 for the 6 weeks
This is a smaller group, just 6 total, and only two hours instead of three, a great group to try if you're neurodivergent, introverted, or want to dip your toes in but tend to feel overwhelmed easily. The format is the same as the Wednesday night Women's Circle: out with the herd if the weather is good (we are Goldilocks—too hot, too cold, too polleny? We are inside :-)); short grounding meditation; circle time where each woman gets to share as much or as little as they'd like in a safe space where no one interrupts or gives advice; back inside for something I've baked (cookies, brownies, etc—or bring your lunch) and then we paint something fun and easy. I will lead you through it step by step and will break things down into bite sized chunks and simple shapes.
I have a friend who comes out to visit the farm a few times a week and has been icky from the heat. We talked about the heat and humidity this week and some things I do to, you know, not DIE.
It's been interesting to see the differences in temperatures in North Carolina since coming back. I was out running errands last Saturday and my car informed me that the temp in the Target parking lot was 111ºF. Not "feels like" but actual. It's always cooler at home, since we are surrounded by natural things, SO much cooler at...104º. I don't remember highs like that in 1983.
So, lets talk about how to keep cool in humidity when you have to, or want to be, outside.
First, shade is non-negotiable. There is no working in the sun. Giant hats aren't enough, you need a giant stand umbrella—I drag this one all around the yard with me when I'm watering.
Next, water. Not plain water though, water with electrolytes. My current favorite is Nuum tablets. I put 1.5 tablets in my 40 oz Stanley and drink 20-40 oz just doing morning chores and watering.
And ice. In your drink of course but I'm talking about on your body. I have this ice neck thingy and this ice vest if I'm staying out longer. It seems like overkill until you experience the humidity. There is no evaporation to cool the body. You just get hotter and sweatier, with no evaporation and no breeze. Everything is very still in the summer here until the afternoon when a thunderstorm rumbles through, throws some rain and wind at you and raises the humidity even more.
Finally, pay attention to your body. Now, this is really hard for those of us 🙋♀️ with "uneven interoception". So, a work around is using a timer instead of waiting to feel too hot. Your body may not tell you when you need to drink (you need to be constantly drinking in the heat), or when you've done too much work, or when you need to stop and sit, or when you need to STOP AND GET INTO THE AIR CONDITIONING. Our bodies don't tell us until we are almost collapsing. So, set a timer on your phone for 5 minutes (and just keep hitting "repeat" or whatever your phone says to make it time another 5 minutes). Drink and check in: Do I feel weak? Is my heart beating normally? (Mine feels either sloshy or rapid or stuttery when my electrolytes are off) Do I feel nauseated? Am I just continuing on because I think I "should" or my brain likes to see the thing done? I've learned the hard way that when I get a case of the "shoulds" I STOP.
THE RANCH
I don't have pics to go with this one but Sweetness is on the naughty list for a while now :-/ I let him out to graze in the yard last weekend and he decided to wander off to the farm next door! Luckily someone was there to help me block him from taking off down the driveway to the road, which he was trying to do. WTF. OMG! And he wouldn't come to me to be haltered either. He's never acted like that before. So, he's stuck in the pasture with the rest of the herd.
Interestingly, just a few days later I had another experience where I was reminded how useful it is to have animals who have been trained to both stay in certain areas and come when called (usually):
I took I Love Lucy out to play frisbee around noon on Monday and looked down into the lower pasture to find the horses grazing in the goat pasture. Jaffee was actually in the goat's nighttime pen, so, gulp, where were the goats?
That was not how I left the setup when I finished morning chores. I went down to the pasture and into the goat barn. No goats. Into the little pasture behind the goat barn, no goats.
😳
Looked out into the forest, didn't see any of them. Looked up on the dam, there they all were, happily grazing right outside their pasture where I often let them go anyway :-) See them up on the dam?
Spider Conversations: I walked into the kitchen this week to see a spider walking across the floor. I got a napkin and laid it in front of him and said, "If you walk onto this napkin, I will take you outside where you can be safe." It didn't move. I told Brad to watch it while I went to get a glass to trap him with.
He said, "Never mind. He got on the napkin, I'll put him out."
You can't tell me they don't hear and understand us.
Lots of creating happening over here lately! Last weekend I painted another peace pole, or garden pole. It's shorter, 39" so it went a lot faster. Plus this time, instead of using craft paint with bad coverage, I used my Golden acrylic heavy bodied paints, so thick and creamy. I was debating on using them on garden art but decided art is art and went for it. It made a huge difference in vibrancy and speed.
Cuteness.
The Crocosmia are blooming! I've only ever seen these bloom at Mom's. I knew I had some here when we moved in but with the trees, nothing. Now:
Lot's of thunder and lightning lately and while the humans are so happy to get the rain, I Love Lucy isn't :-( Hiding and panting in ManChild's bedroom:
The ponies allowing The Duchess of Cashmere and the donkeys to work with a coaching client last week:
Decided to straighten the pantry again. It's weird how messy it gets, as if no one knows where things go, grrrr. Maybe I should get some sort of labels for those baskets ;-) I wonder if there are any with hooks that would go over the side? Little tiny chalkboards would be cute!
I have this little 4" pot on my front porch with nothing in it right now. A baby five lined skink decided to take up residence. It was all of 2" long:
Mom's huge orange cannas have gone to seed, proving that they are some old variety and not the newer sterile versions:
So I will:
- Let those pods dry completely on the stem until they're brown and papery - Harvest the seeds -- they'll be hard dark brown/black round seeds inside - Save them in a paper envelope in a cool dry place - Plant next spring after soaking seeds in water for 24 hours to soften the hard coat - They may not come true to the parent (seeds vary) but that's part of the fun
I can't wait to see what I get! I will let some of the seed fall as well, as I could end up with seedlings the old fashioned way too.
So, you know how I want to create a pollinator garden in the area between the house and the pond? I need soooo much dirt to do it because I don't intend to plant every area flat—I want to create berms too for some height. I have compost and that's what I've been using so far but what I really need is topsoil to mix with my compost. Turns out my neighbor clears land for developers (a lot of that going on around here) and I was able to get topsoil for much less than at a landscape supply. I got 30 yards delivered this week:
I remember getting 3 yards of mulch delivered at our suburban house and feeling so swamped by the amount. Now, looking at 30 yards, I can say that it's not nearly enough but it's a good start. It's very sandy which is nice as that's what our native soil is here too.
But once I take the compost:
And mix it with the new topsoil, I end up with this nice looking darker stuff to plant in:
I'm aiming for a 50/50 mix. Doing a little mixing in the evenings with the tractor when the sun goes behind the trees, that way I'll be ready to create beds when it cools down in September!
When I came in from mixing last night and jumped in the shower, I caught the herd out my bathroom window💜:
MEMORIES
My Raynie and me, back in Colorado:
I had a long talk with Tori this week. Each time I do, I'm surprised at how quickly and clearly she responds, so much like Rayn. She has magic words of wisdom and clarity as animals often do. I think I've been holding off a bit with her, my heart still feels tender after losing Rayn. I'm a little scared of connecting so closely for fear of the losing part. I didn't realize that until this week. Mulling that over and not liking what I find...
And a little jump scare for you:
He was a nice corn snake :-)
HOW TO WORK WITH ME
Equine Partnered Coaching! With horses (early morning appointments in the summer), without horses, or online, your choice.
Neurofeedback Train your brain to calm and ease. The most common response I hear about neurofeedback is, "I'm so much less reactive in my life!" It really does smooth out the sharp spikes. Super helpful if your world feels harsh and spiky right now.
Reiki Another way to facilitate relaxation, calm, healing. If the weather is nice, you can choose outside, or outside in the herd (this is an early morning appointment) and of course in my office is always available :-)
And Women's Circles! 👈🏽This whole section of my site is just a mess right now, outdated. Contact me if you want to talk about Women's Circles!
Wednesday Women's Circle has a waiting list, I will add you to it if you'd like. Newer people do indeed get in occasionally, as sometimes the people higher on the list end up with upcoming vacations, too busy at work, or just life is life-ing.
Tuesday Women's Circle, runs 11am—1pm, Aug 4—Sept 8, the 6 weeks is $210, contact me if you're interested!
Monday online art class via Zoom. Ongoing, every Monday, 7:30-9pmET. $35 There isn't a link for this one but you can contact me for the supply list and link here. I teach you something fun in watercolor or mixed media. It's a low key, jammies kind of class. Right now it's small so you get more one on one instruction if you want it.
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Hope you all have a great week!
Thank you for reading :-)
All of my art and writing is made with human intelligence!
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